I will be starting my discussions with a heavy topic. Let’s just dive right in instead of tapping the water with our toes! Before I begin, I would love to recommend an amazing book: The Four Agreements. I have not finished the book, but I’m in the process of reading it and it’s enlightening. My opinions have been developed from this book, videos, articles, and just self-research.
We all have this idea of perfection. If I was this height, or if my nose was that way or if I became this profession, etc I would be happy. We have these decided ideas of what beauty, success, and happiness is, but we never got to choose these criteria for ourselves– they were decided for us. But why should there be one standard of beauty, success, and happiness? Who became rich and decided this is true happiness, and who followed that idea? Clearly, someone who wasn’t truly happy. Because if you are truly happy, you don’t have to look for it and you won’t be finding it through external means (anything beyond ourselves). Sure, having money eases some worries, but having an excess amount of money just brings on more worry and stress. The problem with this idea of happiness is that it’s insatiable. Once you get that thing you desire, you just keep going to the next step up. You keep telling yourself over and over again”if I just get this one more thing then I’ll be happy .” Till one day you realize, you’re not happy. In conclusion, money, success, fame, beauty, etc. do not bring true happiness.
What we see in others is just a reflection of ourselves. When we judge another person for something, it’s actually what we judge ourselves for and we’re projecting that on the people around us. In essence, the people around us are a mirror of ourselves. But what we judge ourselves and others for are for things that have been indoctrinated into our minds. This goes into the one-size fits all culture of our society. This means that society teaches one model of how everyone needs to look, act, and everything in between. But who ever said society was right? Everyone, because they just followed what the next person followed. We’re all just the blind following the blind, but it’s time to allow ourselves to be happy with the way we look, act, and everything in between, because there’s no one way of looking, behaving, etc that is the best. Once we reach true acceptance of ourselves for whatever ways we are, we will stop judging others too and we will be happier.
To keep this from going on much longer, I will conclude with the idea that happiness comes from inner peace. Inner peace comes from accepting and being our authentic selves. Following the crowd, being who are friends, parents, and teachers want us to be will not give us happiness. So find you who you truly are, what you love to do, and which people encourage you to be who you are without judgement. That will be true happiness.
On the next post, I will philosophizing why being our true selves brings us happiness. Feel free to leave any comments if you agree or disagree with this post and everything in between. I hope this post opened up your mind and made you think a bit.